Recently when listening to a conversation between two people, one of them said, “I am worthy” and this resonated deeply with me. I then started to analyse why this phrase and not a similar phrase, such as “I am enough,” or “I deserve to be loved,” both of which are powerful sentences in their own right. On analysing my response and why this sentence carries so much power, I began to raise several questions to understand more deeply:
- What does it mean to be worthy?
- What is it that I am worthy of?
- How does this affect my life?
- What would this mean to others?
Let me try to answer these questions in a way that brings value to you as the reader starting with, “What does it mean to be worthy?” Words that define “worthy” include notable, deserve or merit respect, to have worth and value. On a shallower note, it can also mean an important and or famous person. You can be “deemed worthy” of something which to me suggests judgement by someone else who decides you are worthy or not. Therein lies the issue – who can hold the position to judge someone else as being worthy of something or not? Jada Pinkett Smith, an actress and movie star wrote a book that she titled “Worthy.” According to Waterstones, it is “a call for compassion and self-love that we all need to embrace.”
Looking more deeply at the varied words that define “worthy”, I have concluded that you are the only one who decides if you are worthy and indeed it is a call for compassion and self-love which has to start with you before it can be extended outwards to others. In other words, embracing your own self-worth. Many of my clients are extremely good at showing compassion and love of and to others while neglecting themselves. I know this because the body tells me through kinesiology, which when the question is asked, is always confirmed by the client. It is as if you are draining the petrol tank of the car and trying to fill up without going to the petrol station. You are draining your energy and eventually wellness in the subconscious hope that giving out compassion and love will be returned in some way, or because of guilt if you do not behave in a way that you feel is expected by others, or perhaps from fear because you do not want to be judged negatively for not being a “responsible” family member, friend, colleague or neighbour.
You are the only one who can fill your energy tank and that means beginning with the belief that you are worthy of self-love and compassion for who you are, not what you feel you should be according to someone or some external influences, such as advertising, “photo” imagery of the perfect man or woman and so on. Your life path and the experiences you carry with you, both good and bad, the mistakes you have made as well as the successes you have experienced all contribute to making you who you are. And someone, no doubt like the rest of us who will make mistakes further on in life, as this is a part of growing and developing.
Going back to my questioning – What is it that I am worthy of? Respect, unconditional love, acknowledgement from others that I exist, success in whatever way I define this, joy in my life, fun and laughter. I doubt my list will be the same as everyone else’s, but that does not make mine wrong and theirs right, we are all right, because we are all unique and all worthy of experiencing life to the fullest extent, and not only that, but the very best things in life. Do not allow anyone to take away or damage your worth through verbal or psychological manipulation, stand your ground and be in your power of knowing your value and self-worth.
Perhaps the third question is the most difficult, because it requires that I really dig deep to understand myself “warts ‘n all”. Part of being a therapist, especially kinesiologist and reiki practitioner in order to offer value to others, I have to be able to address aspects of myself that perhaps I am not proud of, patterns of behaviour that have become ingrained and do not serve me, but are difficult to let go of, identification through labels such as, “Naturopath, Kinesiologist and General Director. I am not the label, I am my own person who does not need a label to be worthy amongst others. The only thing the label does is create some kind of perception of how educated I am, how much responsibility I have and worst of all, whether for some people I am worth talking to for them to be able to get to their goal, whatever that might be. Harsh words these may be, but never-the-less true in many situations.
What might “I am worthy mean for others?” I truly believe the meaning of worthy as described above as “worth and value,” each one of us is the judge of that for ourselves and it will vary from one to another. Each person has a different life path and a different destination in accordance with why we are here and whether we are delivering our value and worth to humankind, adding our contribution of drops into the ocean for humanity as a whole. At the end of the day, it does not matter which you are doing as you are contributing what you are able to contribute, in the way you are able to contribute it while having a human experience, which let’s face it, is not always a smooth ride.
Do you believe you are worthy to receive success, love, respect, joy etc? This starts with self-worth, loving yourself, being able to assess the value you bring in different situations. Stop looking for validation from the outside, as only you can decide. As Louise Hay, wrote and said “I am willing to release the need to be unworthy. I am worthy of the very best things in life and I now lovingly accept it.”
If this blog has affected you and you want to explore which treatments will provide the greatest impact on your journey to 'filling up your own tank' then please do get in touch.
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